SMASH

If you happen to run into Rowan tomorrow, go easy on him. I'm in with A & D reading before bed, Rowan's in his room - singing, per usual, and banging around doing god-know-what - also per usual. I hear this strange, metal-bending drawn-out screeching crash - the kind that has you yelling "WHAT WAS THAT??", while holding your breath - hoping the reply isn't a blood curdling "something-just-landed-on-me-and-severed-my-arm-off" type of scream. Silence. Even worse than the scream. "WHAT HAPPENED??" (now trying to untangle myself from other two kids - who are also trying to untangle- to find out what happened to render him mute. He comes around the corner - hands over mouth - mumbling. No blood - thats a good sign. His brothers try translating for him "You tried to do what?" "Window what?" I remove his hands from his face. "I just dropped the air conditioner out the (2nd+ story) window I DIDN'T MEAN TO!!" Wha? "WHY IS IT SO HEAVY??" Uh...what? why? Seriously?? Yeah. Seriously. Looked just like you'd expect it to look. Smashed. I am now doing my best not to laugh in his face because he is following me around mumbling things like "How did you put that in by yourself?", and "I really thought I had it", and "I"ll fix it. Really mom, I bet I can fix it." So we move it around front, fix the window, and get back to reading. 3 minutes later - another noise. Not so loud, but...not a "good" noise. In comes Rowan, hands up again. In trying to fix the broken outlet cover (yes, A/C was plugged in when it headed south) - this apparently involved sticking his fingers...wait for it....in the socket. He succeeded in shocking himself. The poor apple does not fall far from the tree. Pray for him.