cheers

My family and I have recently moved from a big city suburb to a small New England town. Having grown-up in a suburb of New York City, then spending my adult life outside another large city, I would not call myself a country girl.  Don't get me wrong, I like the country as much as the next girl scout - s'mores!  camp fires! "LOOK! COWS!" - I just could never picture myself living in a place, well, not right outside a city.  While there is a certain appeal to being somewhere where everbody knows your name, (and they're always glad you came,)  for some reason, the thought of that really happening made me want to order another drink.  I was extremely shocked the first time I visited my husbands hometown.  We had been dating for months when he invited me to go "home" with him.  Uh, duh.  Yea I'd go.  We were still in that stay-up-all-night-talking-then-go-to-work-happy-happy-happy-all-the-time phase.  Going out 3 or 4 times a week.  Going out at 10:00(pm), getting up at noon, going out to eat, going to the movies...cooking a meal and doing laundry together was actually fun.  When he took me for a walk through the town he grew-up in I was confused.  I just kept thinking, "really?  REALLY? People actually come from towns like this?"  There is not one stop light.  You (I)can walk the length of the village with out getting winded.  People sit one their front porches and wave to you when you drive by.  The now-retired school librarian still lives right by the school, and still remembers all her students and the books they liked best.  It was beautiful, and I was speechless (a rarity).  I think this little visit actually changed me a bit.  I was (still am to a degree) a huge people pleaser.  "Sure!  I'll watch your cat for a week - no problem - I love animals!  Are you sure just one week?  I can do two weeks if you need - really!"  Of course, I'm highly allergic to cats.  My throat may close-up and my eyes will puff shut.  I'll end up at the allergist office because of course my inhaler is empty and I have no refills left.  I'm taking antihistamines that make me shake and and act like a grumpy-pissed-off person who's had too much coffee.  So I've missed work (dr. appt), missed happy hour(gotta feed the cat), am out about $60 bucks for the office visit and meds, my co-workers think I moody, and I can't get the smell of canned cat food off my hands.  But when you get back, I'll tell you how much I love your cat, and when are you going away again because I'd love to watch him again for you!    All this to say how big a step it was for me not to lie or sugar-coat the answer when my then-boyfriend asked me if I could ever see myself living in a town like that.  I paused.  paused.  and said "No.  I really can't."  Huge for me.  I did not want to continue down the garden path (that is the best part of dating) having him think that I was that type of girl - the type that would follow her man anywhere, stay home, have babies, make dinner, and find time to wave to everyone that went by as I was hanging the sheets on the line.  I felt very adult and liberated to have stood my ground and tell it like it was.  Low and behold, he kept dating me.  And almost 15 years later I'm living in a house surrounded by pine trees (cue the inhaler), waving to everyone when I walk out to get my mail, which is delivered by Mary, my mail carrier, who has been on the job for 20 + years and can tell me anything I want to know .  Not everyone in town knows my name yet, but I'm working on it.